I Hope You Remember Me For More Than My Fat Ass

 

      I love a good story. I always have. I'm a person who cherishes the written word---a person who relishes the complexities of a well crafted yarn woven by a skillful wordsmith.  That's why I was particularly saddened to learn that Colleen McCullough, the author of my all time favorite book, The Thorn Birds, died earlier this week. But, what saddened me even more was to see how Australia's most heralded author was memorialized in her obituary. Here's a excerpt:

"Plain of feature, and certainly overweight, she was, nevertheless a woman of wit and warmth.  In one interview, she said: 'I've never been into clothes or figure and the interesting thing is I never had any trouble attracting men.'"

     Seriously,  Rupert Merdock, was the mention of this woman's weight problem and "plain" face really necessary?  Is her most glowing accomplishment really the fact that she could snag some bootie despite the fact she had a fat ass?
     Beyond the fact that McCullough sold multiple millions of copies of her novels, beyond the fact that her most famous work was adapted into one of the most watched mini series of all time,  beyond the fact that football fans would have never heard the name D'Brickashaw Ferguson if not for Ms. McCullough (okay, his mama probably just watched the TV version because she didn't' bother to spell check that)---this woman was amazingly brilliant.  She studied neuroscience in her native Australia, worked at Great Ormond Street Hospital in London, and spent ten years as a member of the faculty at Yale University.  Folks, that's nothing to sneeze at!
     The truth is, this is how our society views women like Colleen McCullough--- women-- like me.  And that friends, makes me sad.  It is hard being an anonymous woman of size in the real world.  It must be even harder for women of size who live under the glaring scope of celebrity.  Think about it.  When I mention Kirsti Alley--what comes to mind?  Her tenure of Cheers, or pictures of her fat ass splayed across glossy newsprint in the checkout line?    What about Oprah?  The woman's a bizillionaire, a philanthropist, and had enough grit to pull herself up from the grips of poverty to become one of the most successful media icons of our time.  Yet, in spite of her phenomenal success, people still want to focus on her battle with her waistline.
      Women are so much more than rolls of fat and numbers on a scale.  We are powerful, unique, complex individuals--each with our own story to tell.  When I die--and here's hoping that's a long way off-- I want people to remember my inner beauty, not my outward appearance.
        ….I'm a teacher who loves her students.
        ….I'm an animal rescuer who is a sucker for sad puppy dog eyes.
        ….I'm a writer, a reader,  and a ponderer of deep thoughts.
This is who I am.  This is what makes me, me.
     Colleen--you deserved so much better.  You deserved dignity and respect alongside recognition for your contributions to the world.  You made it a better place.   I just hope when it comes time for someone to pen my obituary,  I'm remembered for the person and really am, and not just the extra junk I carry around in my trunk.